February 25, 2022 | Last Quarter Moon in Capricorn | Keila Sachi Gaballo (they/she)
(scroll to the bottom to read the letter <3 )
I've been trying to put out a blog post and send out an email to all you subscribers out there every Full Moon. It's a great time to reflect on all you're grateful for and creative energy is usually at its peak around that time... plus the name of my lil business is MAHEALANI and Back. (Māhealani is the name of the full moon in Hawaiian, and also part of my kiddo's middle name.) Clearly, I missed that this month. And it took a lot of effort to stop myself from shaming myself for missing this self-appointed deadline. But hey, it's here now. I got it out to you all before February ended so I'll count it as a win haha.
February is always a busy month for my family--my bebe, my sister, and my mama all have birthdays in Feb. Lunar New Year typically falls in this month, and there's also Valentine's Day. Our RV anniversary is also on the 1st of February (we've been living full time in this bad boy for 2 full years now). So. It's been a wild few weeks.
I dunno about all of you, but Encanto is still a hot topic in our home. We still listen to the soundtrack nearly every day... yes, we're one of the households keeping it on the Billboard top hits for so long. Ellie, of course, wanted an Encanto themed party this year.
Thank you for six weeks at No. 1 for the #Encanto soundtrack on the @Billboard 200 and four weeks at No. 1 for "We Don't Talk About Bruno" on the #Hot100! 🤫 Disney Music fans are the best around. ♥️ Listen to the soundtrack now: https://t.co/jgdmbVEmEVpic.twitter.com/ZRVOk7MM2h
— Disney Music (@DisneyMusic) February 24, 2022
Since I've now seen the movie and listened to the soundtrack upwards of 525,600 times by now, I've also had the time to analyze each character pretty in-depth and think about the many ways we all kind of embody these characters at one point or another. I thought a lot about each character's individual story and the things that they struggle with. They all have very relatable stories, so I had an idea to write some uplifting, encouraging letters to each character and share them with you all... in hopes that it may feel uplifting and encouraging to you as well.
Ellie and I are both big Luisa fans, and she seems to have a lot of people relating to her story online, so I figured that a letter to all my Luisas out there would be the perfect place to start. With everything going on in the US with homophobic and transphobic legislation popping up in many states, the terrible things happening in Ukraine, and many other countries still dealing with wars and airstrikes... I almost sat on this post and shoved it aside. I almost decided to hold it back for now because there are so many other things to talk about and share and advocate for... but then I realized, this is actually a message that could be a really great reminder for many of us. When the world around us feels so unsafe and things are uncertain, some of us feel this overwhelming pull to act ASAP and do anything and everything just to try to make things better in some way... which often leads to shoving aside our own emotions.
Yesterday morning, I couldn't hold myself together. I broke down because of the paralyzing realization that there are so many people suffering out there, and there's no way for me to personally reach or assist them all. It was so overwhelming and heartbreaking to think about all the people who are suffering and living in fear without the support and resources they need to navigate it all and heal. In that moment, I even started doing the thing I can't STAND... I began comparing traumas and using these terrifying events as ways to invalidate the fear and anxiety and stress I've been experiencing over my own personal problems and trauma responses. I have a long history of gaslighting myself out of feeling my own emotions and just directing my energy towards those who "have it worse" or "need it more than I do."
If you can relate to any of that, if you can relate to Luisa's strong, caring, supportive personality, then this letter is for you. A letter to remind you that you are an incredible human being, not a human doing. You are worthy of Love because of who you are.
Lay Down Your Load:
a letter to all my Luisas
by: Keila
you are so strong.
you're brave. you're caring.
you're selfless.
and. everything you feel,
everything you experience--
even the stuff you bury
beneath the surface--
is all valid.
but.
i need you to know
that all the gratitude
and all the love
that I hold in my heart
for you
is not contingent
on the things that you do
or the mountains you move...
my heart is full
because of the person
that you are.
your strength and
your worth aren't
dependent on whether or not
you can carry it all.
so lay down your load.
discover the strength
in your pause.
the bravery in your heart.
the compassion in your breath.
you are worthy
because of who you are.
so take up space.
give yourself the same
love and care that you
extend to us all.
it's ok to pause.
It's ok to DO nothing
because even in those moments of stillness,
you're still you.
and we will always love you.